Think back to the last time you went to a shop and browsed through the magazine section. Maybe in a supermarket or a WH Smiths. Heat, Hello, Empire… all the usual titles. And maybe you saw a copy of “Woman’s Own”. Compared to the other magazines it’s less glossy – more like a soggy pamphlet. It doesn’t stand out that much.
However, you can’t help thinking you’ve seen the magazine cover before. Even though I don’t read Women’s Own, I can’t help but be drawn to their usually drab covers. Why? Well, they always have Judy and/or Richard on the cover.
A brief history of Richard and Judy: the pair met working at Granada Studios in the early 80s. They were married to other people but left their spouses to be together. Towards the end of the decade and into the 90s, they became huge celebrities. The ultimate power couple who hosted “This Morning”, the nation taking them into their hearts. They were sometimes figures of controversy; Richard did an embarrassing Ali G impression, Judy exposed one of her tits at NTAs and they were investigated as part of the infamous phone hacking scandal in 2007.
After thirteen years on ITV, they moved to channel 4, where they provided the perfect early evening show, with features such as the game “you say we pay” and their book club. They even made guest appearances on huge shows at the time like Little Britain and The Second Coming and were referred to in sitcoms such as Gimmie, Gimmie, Gimmie and Mrs. Merton and Malcolm. They were such icons that late night sketch show Bo Selecta provided a warped interpretation of the pair. (Karma for Richard’s dreadful Ali G impression?)
In 2008, they left channel 4 to start work on Watch, a digital channel where they would premiere their new show, “Richard and Judy’s new position”. The show bombed and they were there for less than a year.
Ever since then they’ve been relatively quiet. No new programmes, only the occasional guest appearance on a chat show here and there. (Although, their book club is still going strong and Judy said some very controversial things on Loose Women.)
So why must Women’s Own magazine constantly feature a cover story about these two former stars? Just look at their website, on their archive page.
http://www.womansown.co.uk/?post_type=issue
On the first page alone, they appear on the cover of four issues. (Linda Robson has her fair share too.) The headlines are as apocalyptic as you’d expect; it’s all “JUDY’S GRIEF” and “Richard & Judy: BLASTED FOR TOO MUCH DRINKING”. Who sodding cares?! Let them drink into oblivion – they’re enjoying their retirement! Good for them!
But why is Women’s Own so obsessed with them? Let me offer you my theory.
The editor of the magazine is Richard’s ex-wife from his first marriage, the one he left for Judy. She’s selling magazines, with unflattering photos and headlines of the two, as part of a revenge plan for them breaking her heart. (She’s also doing the same to Linda Robson, because she wore the same dress as her at a party in 1994.)
So expect to hear a lot more about “JUDY’S HEARTBREAK” and “RICHARD’S ANGER” until the end of eternity itself.
Tommy Talks 